That moment when you fall back two steps.

I've had a lot of weird yet amazing things happen for me recently. One of these has been playing a MMORPG, or Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. This game is called League of Angels or LoA or horrible lol. I never knew this game would be what would draw me to people who would ignite my curious mind. And one who would ignite sparks in my heart, someone who has made the change inside of me feel so simple.
I had been working as hard as I could to earn more and more so I could meet people like the friends I've made on the game. I realized that when the moment came that I would fall back on losing another client in my work that I'd of course be very emotional about it. I've felt I'm not good enough for anyone and that all that I'm trying to do is for naught. But I've learned I'm not useless. 
I have realized that I need to continue doing what I love. What I love is working with animals, writing, YouTubing, video gaming, comic books, books, Operas, ballets, Anime, drawing, cosplaying, and finally Batman. I've realized if I focused more on what I've always loved doing I could earn all the money I'd need and more! And I could finally be stress free in full.
I have taxes still to pay from 2011, and now medical bills that I'm slowly paying off myself. I still have a car to pay off and so much more. Yet I'm happy, I'm happy to have met the people I have in my life. That includes the ones who are still quote unquote "pixels", I love them all.
My life has changed so beautifully with them in my life. I have a chance to keep changing, I'm saving to go to PAX Prime and East, Comic Con, E3!, and just going on my own travels. I feel I've passed up my chance to go and see the world. I was given the chance to go to a school in New York I turned it down, I was also invited to go to China and teach English there. I've learned to let it go and just move on in my life, but now I want to make it the story I want.
I have control of my life and I love that.
KEEP BELIEVING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!